I flew to Vermont to attend the memorial my nephew Jared and Israel were having for their father, my brother John. The event was held in Middlebury at the Sugar House owned by Steve & Beth Dow.
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| The Sugar House |
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| Ashes of John Provoncha |
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| Photos of John through his life |
Lots of people showed up throughout the day and I had a small speech to give. Since that day, I have had several requests for the speech which prompted me to include it in this post. I did not make it completely through on that Saturday. I had to ask someone standing next to me to read the last quote. I told my nephews they were not included in the speech because I knew I would not get through it with them there. Here is the speech:
John Provoncha Memorial - Celebration of Life
Saturday, October 14, 2017
Words presented by BJ Provoncha
I knew I wanted to give a small speech today, to tell everyone a little about my big brother John from the perspective of the baby of the family. For inspiration, I went back 26 years to a talk that Ralph Foote had given at a Memorial held for my father, Harold. Ralph had given me a paper copy of his speech.
As I perused through the three-page eulogy, I realized that I could easily replace Harold's name with John, and the words would still mean the same. For example, Ralph said right off, "…for all the days of his life Harold was filled with grace." I could say the same for John.
Ralph said later "Friendships were important to Harold --- one could not acquire too many --- and all the world was eligible." Again, replace Harold's name with John.
My favorite thing that Ralph said was about my grandparents, "As a kid growing up he was blessed with an exceptional home environment." Well, John grew up in that same environment. Listen to this, Ralph said, "they were not only Mom and Dad to their kids but to all the kids on the street and all their kid's friends from school." Sound Familiar? Harold & Stella.
Being the Baby of the family, I want to thank big brother John & Tom, and my sister Pat, for wearing out Mom & Dad when it came to discipline. By the time I got to high school age, my parents' rules were as simple as "Don't get in an accident!"
John was many things. John was a hero, just ask Rene Paquette. Rene and I were playing by the creek behind the house. Rene fell in. I could have tried to be the hero but I made the decision to go get help. The first person to respond was my teenage brother John who ran down the hill to the river, jumped in and pulled Rene out. I figured I was not a hero but I was smart!
John loved Christmas. He gave me my first cassette player with a Rolling Stones cassette. John's friends were part of what I thought was a normal tradition at our house. Christmas morning before you open presents you had to pull the passed-out, drunk sailor from under the Christmas tree. The first was Vern Riley, and then Dave Riley and then Jay Torrey. What a tradition.
John loved to organize things. Softball teams and games. Trips to see concerts. Festivals in the mountains. I remember we had rented a Vermont transit bus to Saratoga from the Dog Team where John was a chef. On the way home, middle of the night, John had the driver stop at the end of Weybridge street to leave me off. He probably could have convinced the guy to leave me off the house. That was John!
John liked to drink! I have a blog and I mentioned in a post the different drink phases. There was the Boones Farm phase. The beer and Schnapps phase. The Tanqueray and Tonic Phase. The Harbor Lights Phase. I am sure there were others. He liked to drink, but it was always with friends and family.
John liked to play cards. Cribbage, oh Hell, Hearts, Poker. I am sure people have stories related to that…
I would like to conclude with another quote from Ralph. This goes out to all the relatives of John here today. As Ralph said, "you do not lose someone when the memories are so good, so clear and so clean."
Thank you!
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